It’s been about a year since I have really drawn anything.
I’m slowly easing back in, but it hasn’t been easy. Being on hiatus from creating has really left me feeling some major imposter syndrome. I’m trying to push past it and start to draw more often.
I’m not really sure why I stopped drawing while I was pregnant. It’s hard to explain. The stress and worry during my pregnancy coupled with some terrible awful nausea just wiped all of creativity and inspiration away.
During this time, I almost felt like I was in survival mode. Anything that could go on the back burner was shelved.
It’s such a battle to come out of survival mode, but it helps me to be aware of it.
I’ve struggled a lot with reverting into my survival mode. I do this a lot when I’m stressed or overwhelmed. It’s almost like I numb myself and go on auto pilot just to cope with difficult feelings.
I’m definitely still working on coping with this survival instinct that I often revert to and the negative impact it has on my mental health.
Now that I am about 3 months postpartum, I’m finally starting to feel like myself again and the urge to create has returned! Slowly but surely, I’m feeling less numb and more present in my life. It’s such a wonderful feeling to come out on the other side of this tunnel.
I’m excited to see what I will create next. I plan to post my art more frequently.